Tomfuckery

I finally got my Fitbit to sync on Friday morning. It synced all of Thursday and that was it. So I had to manually enter my steps as exercise for the rest of Tuesday and all of Wednesday. So, taking those photos didn’t seem so insane after all!

And doing my walks in the evening pushed me to my very first, I do believe, all 10k+ each day week! Go me!!fitbit weekly stats

But what I learned today is that my manually entered steps didn’t count in the rankings and instead of being in 2nd place on my friends list, by less than 2k!, I’m in 4th place. What?!?! This is some Fitbit Bullshit right here!

fitbit bullshit

So, I guess once Tuesday and Wednesday stats fall off I’ll be in my correct ranking position and I can quit being an obsessive maniac over the whole thing.

But, again…if it’s getting me to actually move more and care about losing the weight then it’s a good mania. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Finish Line

Apparently when I’m doing other things out here in my real life, I can’t keep up with being up to date here. It’s fine.

Thursday gym looked like this:

FM hack squat 60×15 80×15 80×15
KB front squat with reverse lunge 18×10 18×10 18×10
FM cable curl & press 20×10 20×10 20×10
Planks 30s 45s 60s
Supermans 20 20 20
Leg lift crunch 10 / 10 10 / 10 10 / 10

I was late getting to the gym due to work so only got in 45 minutes. But he is really pushing me now. No more long breaks in between. Work and talk. Talk and work. Progress, Andrea! We’re making it.

Super hot trainer was there again. So I put on my smiley face. Every time he even looked like he was looking my way? I was smiling. Big, nice, happy girl smile. That’s how I flirt.

I did not hike this weekend due to the Relay for Life. But then the relay wound up getting rained and winded out. I walked for about an hour before this super wind hit and blew down all of the tables, tents, foods, and brought heavy cold wind. This does happen in the desert. Now you know!

Before decided whether or not we were going to call the relay a wash or not we wound up at Applebee’s as it was the only place open that late. I told the waitress I was sorry for “being that person” but she was so awesome in helping me put together something I could eat that would be compliant. She even sat down at the table and went over some options with me and we settled on a nice 4oz steak and sweet potato fries. She was awesome, nice, helpful, and patient and I wish I’d gotten her name so I could send in a note. That’s how much I appreciated her.

I spent my weekend cleaning my house and cooking. I bought a Dutch oven and new pots and pans. Then I cleaned my house and now my dogs are trying to put their touch on it buy spreading the inside of their stuffed toys hither and yon. Oh, dogs.

I always put off the cleaning. Especially of my room. I’ll clean the whole house and leave my room for last and then decide, eh…who’s seeing it anyway?

The answer is me. I’m seeing it. And I finally really saw it.

A nice glimpse into the teenager that, apparently, still lives in my soul.

A nice glimpse into the teenager that, apparently, still lives in my soul.

IMG_2689

But then I cleaned it and now I have the soul of an adult.

IMG_2696

IMG_2697

In my cleaning I got rid of 26 items bringing my total to 249 items tossed out of my house. This consisted of old towels that barely covered my body thanks to being holey that I got for wedding gifts in 1995 and was still using, old undies that were not suitable for viewing, and then ten random assed things I had laying about my room that serve no purpose other than to take up space. No more randoms! You are out of here.

I also got rid of all of the cat stuff that I thought I’d already gotten rid of and hung more stuff on the walls in the computer room. So, I was busy and productive.

More cooking occurred to stay on the Whole30 and I am now on Day 29!!! Tomorrow is Day 30!! I’m gonna put creamer in coffee on Wednesday and see what happens! I’m planning to go out for a nice, local burrito that doesn’t have cheese on Friday! WOO!!

The last few days, though, I’ve felt nauseated off and on. Which sucks because I have no idea what is causing it. I am eating super healthy, I am sleeping so great, I have energy, etc. And then now? Random nausea. That sucks. Like, even right now I feel as if I could hurl. Not the best feeling, that.

I won’t weight myself again until Wednesday. Weigh and measure for the final results. I AM SO EXCITED!

There’s, also, people at work that have noted the improvements. One is now doing the Whole30 and asking me lots of questions, which is great, and another has made lots of healthy improvements in her diet. I think that is fantastic.

And now I’m gonna go lay down and try not to puke. You’re welcome!

So Many Ouches

So it’s a wild Friday night and I’m updating my blog. With up to dateness. Watch out!

Yesterday was gym day. So, I did my warm ups. And then we did the “Hey, our anniversary was yesterday!” high five. And then? He killed my legs.

So, he puts me on the hip abduction machine thing. It looks like a gyno chair.

Seriously. Would you like to look at my cervix now or later?

I had to push this thing open with my legs and closed, as pictured, with my legs. This shit was hard. I forget which was which but I did three sets of 15 with 30 pounds one way and three sets of 15 with 70, 80, then 90 pounds the other.

In between the gym based leg spreading, I had to sit down then stand up with one leg, balance on that leg, then sit back down. Three sets of 10 sits and stands with each leg.

After that portion we went over and I had to jump up on the low box. Three sets of twenty jumps. I am not a jumping bean, I told him. He informed me that yes I am. So I guess I am.

Then I had to put a band around my ankles and do leg kick backs. Three sets of 20 with each leg. I felt this in my glutes. I suspect that is where I was supposed to feel that.

Then I had to move the band close to my knees and do three sets of 20 jump squats. This made me very dizzy and tired. The whole thing did, really, but it seemed to be really pronounced during this. Likely since I was in more overall motion. Stupid dizzy. But he did point out that doesn’t happen as much as it used to and you know what? He’s totally right.

Then I did three sets of 15 hamstring curls with 30 pounds. It seemed so much easier last night than it ever has! That must mean I’ve actually progressed. Woo!

I also did calf raises on a machine with weight added but I didn’t make note of how much weight and the spreadsheet did not save. I know he filled it out, though. But, again, not saved. Grrrr!

Yesterday and today my arms have just been so sore from what we did on Tuesday. Like, just opening doors hurts. Lifting my arms to put on deodorant hurt. Just a lot of soreness. But that’s good. Sore means I really worked it.

Today my inner thigh area is sore. Likely from the gyno machine.

And that is all I have to report. I took Gladys on a not worth mentioning walk this evening and tomorrow morning I am opting to sleep in and not go hike and I am going on a nice, leisurely, scenic drive with a friend to a local state park I’ve not been to and check out the wildflowers that we hear are already in bloom! I’ve already charged my camera battery.

It’s good to have some downtime. Since I took that one week off from gymming and hiking we realized my knees have been better. Not as many complaints in the gym and they haven’t gotten as tired on the trails. So, yeah. Downtime is good all around!

And in my financial health news I just ended my latest budget period with a surplus. It’s the type of surplus that makes me nervous that I have forgotten to pay something or somebody. I’m not used to having a healthy budget, I guess.

Happy weekend!

No time to waste on coming up with a catchy title!

We have a lot to cover. Let’s go!

Day: Thursday 2/19/2015 Weigh-In: Session Duration:
Exercise Set Reps % 1RM Set 1 Set 2 Set 3
DB Bosu ball chest press 20×10 20×10 20×10
Med ball slams 30×10 30×10 30×6
Step burpie to squat hop 10 10 10
Decline sit ups 10 10 10

I didn’t do a lot this session, as you can see. But he gave me a pass because I did a lot of new stuff.

The bosu ball chest press was new. I had to lay down on the bosu ball while maintaining my balance and doing chest presses. That was OK. For my first time he said I did really well.

The medicine ball slams I seem to recall being weird and convoluted and wore me out. I’m thinking they were the ones where I had to squat down to pick it up then as I stand up I lift it over my head with one arm and then slam it down, alternating arms. And, yeah, that shit wore me out.

After that he took me to the side and I could see him thinking and then he said “Yeah, this…” and I accused him of making it up and he totally admitted that he made it up. I had to straddle the step, then do a burpee, then squat down, then stand and jump fluidly in one motion onto the step, then jump down and then grab the step and do another burpee then repeat. It was a lot. I was tired.

Add in the decline situps that I hate and this session was kinda lame. But he said it wasn’t and that was that.

On February 21st we did a 10.3 mile hike at South Mountain, which is part of the National Trail. My anxiety was high for some reason so I wanted to leave and go home to get some quiet. I was all twitchy and everything just seems so loud and I was like a sponge to other people’s stress and strife. Instead my awesome hiking friends gave me the walkie talkie and let me hike alone for a bit and then I caught up and it was glorious. It really did me a world of good being able to hike alone for a bit.

Hiking alone, leaving my stress in the dust.

Hiking alone, leaving my stress in the dust.

Then on Sunday I did the easy hike with my girl, Gladys. She is such a little hiker! She’s very well behaved, social, and happy. I love it.

Happy hikers.

Happy hikers.

Monday I took her for a wee walk around the neighborhood but it was cut short by my adult responsibilities. Stupid adult responsibilities.

Day: Tuesday 2/24/2015 Weigh-In: Session Duration: 60
Exercise Set Reps % 1RM Set 1 Set 2 Set 3 Set 4
High step ups 10 10 10
Band side steps (green band) 20 / 20 20 / 20 20 / 20
Band front walks (green band) 20 20 20
Band back walks (green band) 20 20 20
TRX single leg lunge with hop 2 10 / 10 10 / 10
SB supinated hamstring curls 2 15 15
SB single leg glute bridge 2 10 / 10 10 / 10

We started this session, as you see, with high step ups. It was high. But after my latest hikes I’m glad we did these!

Then I had to put a band around my ankles and sidle around. It’s harder than it looks.

On the band front walks I kept popping up too high so he told me to pretend I was sneaking up on someone. At one point a hot dude was down at the other end that was my ending spot so we acted like I was sneaking up on him and Tyler laughed because that totally worked and I maintained the proper form better and? Held my hands in the “I’m sneaking up on you” position. I’m a creeper, obviously.

Then I had to do the TRX single leg lunge with a hop! This is where I put one foot in the TRX handle and then lunge forward. But then add in a hop. For some reason I could not do this with my shoes on. So, barefoot TRX lunges it was! And that helped me with my form and balance and everything. I’m odd.

When I did the first single leg glute bridge? I was way too loud because ouch. He stretched out my leg and that was ouch, too. So much ouch.

On Wednesday I took Gladys for a longer, more interesting walk in the neighborhood. One with goats and horses and chickens. She enjoyed it much better. She stopped to look at all of the critters but never tried to chase or bark. She’s a good little thing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Gladys!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Gladys!

Day: Thursday 2/26/2015 Weigh-In: Session Duration:
Exercise Set Reps % 1RM Set 1 Set 2 Set 3
Hs incline chest press 20×15 20×15 20×15
HS low row 50×15 50×15 50×15
Lat pull down underhand grip 50×15 60×15 60×15
Tricep cable push downs 50×15 50×15 50×15
DB seated shoulder press (no back) 12.5×12 12.5×12 12.5×12
DB standing bicep curls 12.5×12 7.5×12 7.5×12
Rotator cuff work

All I remember about this workout was that the first four exercises he had me do heavier weight than I’ve used and he helped me out a lot. But he said that totally counted. I’m unconvinced.

Then while I was doing the dumbbell presses and curls he noticed my right arm moving in a weird way and determined my rotator cuff needs to be strengthened and gave me more exercise to do at home as I stretch and roll out. Nobody wants me to sit on the couch and have free time anymore. Nobody. Curses!

Then on Saturday I traveled to Oro Valley with some of my hiking friends for the Move Across 2 Ranges event!

Check point one.

Check point one.

The first hike was in the Tortolita Mountains and it was 9.5 miles with 1,975 feet of elevation gain! I got a little far behind my group for a bit because there was a series of switchbacks that scared me. They were steepish and narrow but I managed it just fine. And I just know realized that I managed it just fine by myself! Huh. But they kinda realized that it was an area that likely scared me so they stopped and waited for me to catch up to make sure I was ok. One of them admitted she was glad I didn’t turn around. So, they know.

I took pictures of the scenes from time to time but none of them really capture how beautiful this area is. It was so lovely and awesome and it made me gasp from time to time at how lucky I am to live in such a gorgeous place.

I wish I remembered more details about the first hike. I just remember the scary of going up that one area. The beauty. The making it to the top. The changing of my socks and the wind being so cold. Then coming back down and realizing that, yeah, I just did that and that I was going to go ahead and do the second part, too!

The second part was at Catalina State Park in the Catalina Mountains 5.5 miles, 1,370 feet elevation gain. The miles and the elevation gain were taken from the information the event people gave us when we arrived.

As we’re driving to the second hike location we’re approaching these tall, rocky looking mountains and we keep saying “Um…that’s not what we’re doing, is it?!” And, you know. It was. It really was. So we get there and we start on our way and it’s fine and in a wash and then suddenly we’re climbing up this mountain. I’m doing ok. It’s fine. It’s steep and rocky but fine. Then? Holy shit I see wide open space and I freak the eff on out. From that point forward I was a sweaty, anxiety filled mess that did, in fact, cry for a bit as I continued to walk forward while also, out loud, berating myself for torturing myself this way. “Who does this?!?!” I proclaimed. Cindy says “Mountain goats!” “WELL I’M NOT A MOUNTAIN GOAT!” I answer. All the while continuing to climb and move forward up the mountain. Because I was NOT going to turn around. I was NOT going to give up. I was going to finish this scary as hell to me hike and so I did, dammit.

When we arrived to the checkpoint I got my passport stamped and then I said hi to the others in our group and then I removed myself and cried, sobbed really, for five minutes to release all of that fear and anxiety that needed to get out before I started going back down. And that worked. I was slow going down but I didn’t cry. I didn’t yell and cuss. I did sit down and scoot down a few rocky areas that I didn’t really want to be tall and on my feet for. But I made it. I finished. I did the hike I set out to do and I did it with the help of Cindy and my own force of pure stubborn will. But I did it! WOO!

Afterwards we went to the afterparty and won some prizes and then went to eat Mexican yums.

Once I was home I let Gladys outside to pee, I put Gladys to bed, I took a shower, and I went to bed with wet hair and all and slept the sleep of the very tired.

Sunday we woke up and went on our easy Sunday hike to make sure our bodies stay active.

We like to show off our event t-shirts the next day.

We like to show off our event t-shirts the next day.

This hike is the same hike I did with this group last August for the very first time. Sabrina said I was very cautious on that hike as to how I would place my feet and that I would get a laugh out of that now. And I really did. Because this hike is easy, lame, and ugly. So boring! I’ve come a long way, baby!

Day: Tuesday 3/3/2015 Weigh-In: Session Duration:
Exercise Set Reps % 1RM Set 1 Set 2 Set 3
Assisted pull ups 110×10 130×10 150×10
LF crunch mach 70×20 70×20 70×20
Seated cable underhand row 40×12 40×12 40×12
Tricep cable push downs 50×15 50×15 50×15
HS incline chest press 2 20×12 25×12
Back extensions 3 15 15 15

I had no idea I was still weak from the weekend. None. My warm ups were ok. My body felt fine. Then I got up on the assisted pull up machine and stood on the platform and it went down and then my arms pulled me u..u….u……u…….p and then I lowered again and then I engaged my arms and, yet, there I dangled. It was horrible. I got the giggles and then that just made me weaker. He helped me on the rest of that set and all of the second set. I managed to pull myself up all ten times on the third set. Good lord.

The LF crunch machine just felt all wrong on my lower back and we moved the seat and changed the weight and finally the last set was ok-ish after he dropped it to 50lbs for the last 10.

The seated cable underhand row was ok. As was the tricep cable push down. Until I felt my neck/shoulder area go twinge.

I did the incline chest press and the back extensions ok. It only seemed to twinge when I did everyday motions. Standing up, sitting down, flipping my hair away from my face. So he made me roll it out and that hurt like hell. It’s on the left side. The right side feels fine. The left you can literally see the knot. So now I have to roll that and my right hip and my everything and work my rotator cuff and not just sit and stare at all ever.

Today is the one year anniversary of me working out with Tyler at the gym. It’s been a great year.

One year gymmingversary selfie!

One year gymmingversary selfie!

I’ve not lost weight but I have gained confidence, new abilities, better posture, and better health. All good things. So if I have to continue to know how to dress myself in ways that make me look fabulous while I know what is going on underneath there? So be it. That’s fine. In fact I may even celebrate this momentous occasion by baking brownies.

I am now in the process of scheduling and planning harder hikes between now and the end of May so I can continue training and improving and practicing my skills to prepare for the Canyon. Which is only 88 days away.

Holy shit. That's really soon!

Holy shit. That’s really soon!

I better go get on all of that!

New Things!

Monday I wore a pair of my Doc Martens to work and realized they just do not fit. So I asked a coworker that wears my size if she’d want them and she enthusiastically said yes! So they are now hers. I forgot to take a photo, though, before giving them to her. But they are part of my 1,000 Things Project. I will no longer hold on to things I cannot use! That brings my total to 157 items outta here!

I walked Gladys on Monday. We, apparently, think walking around our neighborhood is boring. We’ll both happily walk 4 miles in the desert and not once slow down or look bored. But a 1.37 mile walk around the neighborhood just makes us both unhappy. We need closer desert, I guess.

Also, on Monday, I used my new cookbook and made Chicken Enchilada Stew!

Ingredients!

Ingredients!

And it turned out DELICIOUS!!!

You can't taste this but you can tell. You know this is tasty good.

You can’t taste this but you can tell. You know this is tasty good.

Tuesday I gymmed! When I get to the gym I did my warm ups and then had to wait for Tyler to finish up with his other client. The back door of the gym was propped open so I went and stood out there and just enjoyed the quiet and the being outside and the perfect temperature. When he came out to get me I explained that I just needed some quiet before we got to work. He then suggested we just work out there! He brought out dumbbells, a medicine ball, and a weighted basket ball type ball and I did my thing out there. And? It was really awesome. It was quiet and perfect and I just enjoyed it so much.

I did curl & presses with a half squat. Three sets of 20.
I did squats then swung a kettlebell up and back down. Three sets of 20.
I threw the weighted basketball up at the wall from my chest level and caught it for three sets of 20.
Then I backed up and threw that ball from over my head to the wall and caught it for three sets of 20.
Lunges on the stairs while pressing the medicine ball up. Three sets of 20 on each leg.
Then side squats with one leg on a stair and the other on the ground while holding the medicine ball at chest level. Three sets of 20.
Then I did two things inside. Crunches on some machine where I hold the straps that are attached to the weights and then crunch over. Three sets of 15. Then I had to do crunches on the roman chair. The kind where your back isn’t touching the pad, just your butt. And he said “You’ve gotten stronger!”

And you know what?!? I allowed myself to say “I KNOW! I have!” Because I have.

We then discussed that my one year anniversary is March 4th and just how far I’ve come since then. And now he’s going to put together some scary tough anniversary work out for Tuesday AND Thursday of that week. I can do it.

Today I ordered a new cheese shredder since I killed my cheapy one. This time I bought a good one. And I bought a ladle. For using with my crock pot. My kitchen is getting so mature.

Then I also went and bought new gym shoes!

This gave me some angst because I do not want bright, neon gym shoes and that’s the norm these days. So I looked around at the online stores that have them and they were all the same price no matter which shop it was. But at Road Runner Sports I’m a VIP member and I had a coupon. So, they won. But they don’t offer all of the colors that the Brooks Ghost 7 come in.

I had really wanted this one:

I love purple!

I love purple!

But Roadrunner Sports only has these colors listed on their site:

pink brooks minty gum brooks blue brooks

I had finally decided I’d go with the blue! They’re not so bright and they’re different than what I have now. And, according to my friends, they’d make me faster and stronger and super desirable.

These guys will now be my walking the dog shoes!

These guys will now be my walking the dog shoes!

But, of course, when I got to the store they only had the pink or the minty gum colored ones. I totally hate the pink. Hate them a lot. So, I went with the minty gum ones. They’re, what I imagine when I look at all of the options, newer version of what I already had!

There's some purple there! Yay purple!

There’s some purple there! Yay purple!

I introduced the old to the new and we all had a good talk and everyone is fine and dandy with this whole thing. And? I got new gym shoes and saved $25 in the process. So, that’s all a good day right there.

Brooks Ghost 6, meet Brooks Ghost 7.

Brooks Ghost 6, meet Brooks Ghost 7.

And then I came home and ate all of the things because that seems to be what I do now. Is be hungry and eat.

I, also, am trying to determine whether or not I’m going to lose this nail:

My gross toe.

My gross toe.

The nail has looked bruised and there seemed to be a callus formed under it, too. Well, I was finally able to peel away some of the callus and then it looks like the bruise is drying up but the nail is also, kinda, loose? I dunno. I’m hoping I can be gentle with it and the nail will grow out and I can just keep cutting and peeling and not really ever lose it. That’s my hope. That’s my toe. Now you know.

Now I shall go reflect on how to be faster, stronger, and more desirable in my new, but not blue, shoes.

Lost Time

So! One would think I would have a whole lot to say to catch back up. One would be a little bit wrong.

I didn’t get to workout last Tuesday as last week at work was NUTS and I only got to work out with Tyler on Thursday. But we did this stuff:

TRX rows 10 10 10
Weight stick shoulders up & over 20 20 20
Med ball squat toss down turf 15xLOT 15xLOT 15xLOT
Med ball hold overhead down turf 15LOT 15LOT 15LOT
Crunch 15 15 15
Crunch feet up 15 15 15
Leg lifts 15 15 15
Toe touches 15 15 15
Leg extensions 25×15 25×15 25×15
Gorilla squats 10 10 10

The first time I was doing the medicine ball squat and toss down the turf I wasn’t doing it totally right. Then I did them totally well. Then he made me add in burpees on the last set and everything went to shit.

The last set of the medicine ball hold overhead was me actually lifting it up and down over my head as I walked down the turf.

Then I did so many crunches. SO MANY CRUNCHES!

I have no idea what a gorilla squat is. None. Unless it was those squats I did to stretch out my hamstrings, which I assume it is since I did that between each set of leg extensions.

Then my Dad came to town and we spend Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at the Phoenix Waste Management Open, the PGA event. It was so fun. Saturday I wore my FitBit and inbetween all of the walking we did there and the walk I gave Gladys I walked 7.5 miles that day! Go me!

Yesterday I had cold symptoms and a sore throat so Tyler told me to keep my cooties to myself. So there is no more update for this here blog.

Today I am home from work getting some rest. I think I really just needed some rest. It’s as important to your health as all of the exercise and eating right. So, here I am. Getting rest. Go me.

butterfly belly

The other day I was waiting for Tyler to be ready to start our session and I heard two of the trainers talking about their weight. One was all “Yeah, I’m up to 217 and bro friend is mad since I’m heavier than him but mine’s fat. What are you up to now?” The other answered “205!” and the first was all “Nooice!” And I was all “The fuck is happening here?” It was not anything you’d hear between two lady friends. I was amused.

Then we got to work. And we did A LOT!

Vertical chest press 80×10 80×10 80×10
BM incline chest press 40×10 40×10 30×10
BM seated row 60×10 80×10 80×10
SB DB shoulder press 10×10 10×10 10×10
SB DB Bicep curls 10×10 10×10 10×10
SB DB crunch 10×10 10×10 10×10
Rope jumping jacks 15 15 15
Rope single arm slams 10 10 10
Single arm med ball slams 2 4×16 10×20
Bosu ball crunch 2 15 15
Bosu ball alt knee to elbow 2 20 20
Bosu ball alt hand to foot 2 20 20

That vertical chest press? I am only giving myself credit for 70lbs because he helped. Not a lot but he was involved.

The BM incline chest press KICKED MY ASS. I have no idea why. It made me feel weak and ineffectual.

I hate the rope jumping jacks. It’s awkward. I feel awkward and he wouldn’t tell me if I look as awkward as I feel so that totally means I do.

Then a lady trainer was all “Oh, I like your Brooks! Are those this season’s Ghosts?” and I was all “No! This is last year’s and I love them” and she was all “Oh, me, too!” and I finally got to actually discuss the latest fashion trends in a manner that made sense to me. About gym shoes. I can’t even begin to tell you how amusing all of this paragraph is to me.

While I was doing the single arm rope slams I was killing it with the right arm. We had to train the left arm to go straight up and down in a slamming motion instead of a circular pulling the rope to me motion. My left side is weird, y’all.

After that he wanted me to do single arm medicine ball slams. I tried to explain that my hand is not large enough to palm a ball and that was why I wasn’t a Harlem Globetrotter and he was all “That’s the ONLY reason?” and I was all “Yeah. The only one.” But then I finally got the motion down with the 4 pound ball and then he made me do them for real with the 10 pound and I slammed and slammed and slammed.

We finished the evening with him killing my abs. Two ab circuits in a week. Under my belly flab are some nice abs, I just know it!

Once we were done with that I rushed to my car and got into traffic and went to dinner with my hiking group to discuss the plan for tomorrow. The big event!! It’s tomorrow!! Woooo! We’re meeting at 6:30am so I should go to bed soon. But only after I catch up with Oliver Queen.

I walked Gladys this evening and I’ll foam roll and then that’ll be that.

Tomorrow is so serious that I even bought Gatorade! My first one ever!

Fruit punch won't be gross, yeah?

Fruit punch won’t be gross, yeah?

I’ve had some Gatorade, sure. And it was yuck. But I’ve never willingly bought it. Or needed to buy it. Until now! I’m a person that has to rehydrate, y’all!

Tomorrow is a big deal for me. I think it’s because this is a mountain that I can actually point to and say “You see that? I walked from one end to the other.” All of my other hikes have been in places that are tucked away so they don’t feel as tangible or something? But this I see as I drive around. You can see it as you land at Sky Harbor. And? It’s something that just a year ago I would never have even have been able to fathom me doing. And now I can. I am so proud of myself. I wish that was enough, though. I find myself wanting to hear from all of the people that they’re proud of me, too. I guess I’m likely to never ever stop looking for approval and acceptance. That may just be who I am.

Who I am is ok, though.