This morning I got on my scale at home, which is a thing I very dumbly do every damn day. But this morning it indicated that I’d gained 4 pounds in a day and put me right back where I started.

After I set fire to everything I sat down in the smoke and thought about things logically. There is no way a person can gain 4 pounds in one day. The battery in my scale is dying. I have to tap it to turn on multiple times before it finally does and this is the last symptom of a dying battery. I don’t feel heavier and I would if I’d put on that much.

Once logic grabbed hold I put out all of the fires and continued to get ready for work. Once at work I got on the scale and saw something much more realistic. An increase, from my last official office weigh in, of just two pounds. That is expected. That is realistic. I will now buy a new battery for my home scale to protect the world around me from flames.

I have been feeling, um…backed up recently. So, I used my flame rage this morning and went to McD’s for breakfast to help get things moving. I now have high chest pains that are quite likely gas related and I think that was a good call. In my period induced dizziness last week I increased the amount of iron containing foods I’d been eating and that likely did this. Now I have to counter balance that. Great.

Next week I’m going to take a page out of Randi’s book and have salads for lunch. I’ve not been eating as healthy as I could or should the past two or so weeks and I just don’t feel super great. I think I need to reset and refocus. And so I shall.

I don’t know when this became a journal of my periods and poops but there you go. Enjoy the riveting drama of Andrea and her body.


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