The Stories We Tell

I rearranged my workout schedule with Tyler so I could do this Halloween kayaking thing on Thursday and since it was something active he was all for it. So, that means this week I meet with him on Monday and Wednesday. Last night was Monday! Here’s what went down…

I show up and we do the usual what hurts how do you feel routine and I told him about my headache, which was likely lack of caffeine related, and my numb-ish toe. His last client was still there and he’d introduced us to one another and she was super friendly and started asking me questions about the toe and none of us could figure out what the what and we all agreed that it was weird. She told me about her toe nails falling off after hiking and I was all ew over that.

Then? I did all of this:

DB front step squats 15×10 15×10 15×10
DB bicep curls (1) 15×10 15×10 15×10
DB shoulder press (1) 15×10 15×10 15×10
Rope slams 20s 20s 20s
Side lateral step ups (each leg) 10 10 10
Decline leg lifts 10 10 10
Decline sit ups 10 10 10
FM tricep extensions 20×10 20×10 20×10
DM lat pull down 40×10 40×10 40×10
TRX hold challenge 43s

The rope slams? The first time I ever did these I barely really moved the ropes. Last night? The entire length was moving. Not a lot, mind you. But it was moving all the way down to the end and I was very much full of yay! and said “Dude! The entire length of rope moved!” and he said “Yeah. You’re getting stronger!” and I was all “I am!”

While I was doing the side lateral step ups I noticed my balance was pretty good and that reminded me that my balance was pretty good while I was hiking on Saturday and just walking along on the tops of rocks and when I told him that? We both, literally, did this:

“YES! I rock!”

Because we both felt like we rock. It was funny. Maybe you had to be there. But you weren’t.

Also during the side steps my toe felt weird so I indicated that. The following conversation ensued:

T “I may need you to show me your toe.”
Me “Did you just say you may need to look at my toe?”
T “Yes.”
Me “I’m not going to show you my toe, dude. I charge people a fee online for that.”
T with a look on his face that indicates he might believe me “Do you?”
Me with a trying to be dubious face “Do I?”
T “I’m not sure…”

And then I admitted that I do not and then went on to tell him my history of having weirdos like my feet on Flickr and my freckles and things of that sort that I’m sure he wishes I’d just shut up about.

The tricep extensions sucked, the lat pull downs did not.

We then had five minutes to kill so he’s all “I have a challenge for you!” and he shows me that he wants me to do a pull up on the TRX row rope equipment thingermabob and then hold that position for as long as I can. My arms got really burny so I had to stop but I made it to 43 seconds which he seemed to be ok with.

He told me I did a good job and then sent me on my way.

Today is Tuesday and I’m still doing OK with not eating all of the things but right now I want nothing more than to hop in my car and go to the store to buy more ice cream so I can make a milkshake. Like, really bad. I want this. A lot. Bah!

Tomorrow is Wednesday. And now I’ve suddenly turned into Rebecca Black

But, since I was all “Fuck my extra fat!” and all body shaming myself last week I thought I should show you that I’m all “Yay! I have a butt!” and smiling about my body now.

BUTTS!

BUTTS!

And that’s all.

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