Muggy, Sticky, Whiny

It’s been humid as all hell this week and I’ve been totally whiny and horrible about it. I hate the humidity and I always have. I didn’t deal with it well when I lived in it full time so I definitely don’t deal with it well now that I’m all acclimated to the desert. No thank you, humidity. I’m all good.

So, I didn’t get to make my Tuesday session with Tyler because a virus was unleashed on the network so I had to deal with that. So, no gym.

I’ve been walking my wee girl each evening but even she doesn’t like the humidity. She is truly a desert dog. She’s really kinda funny to watch. She wants to go and she’s all gung ho at first, like we all are. But then the humidity takes hold and you can see the heaviness hit her and she gets slower and slower until she’s actually stopping to be all “ugh. This is the worst.” And I agree. I agree, Gladys. Humidity is totally the worst.

So, cut to Thursday at the gym and I act like a child. I’m gonna apologize to Tyler.

This was just not a good week, anyway. You know how you feel like you have shit under control and you have maybe just a wee little baby flame hidden away but then you learn that, no, you have a torch and hope and you keep that torch alive with the light of your hope?! No? Well, I do. It’s not good.

So, I went to the gym Thursday prepared to work it all out. But, instead, humidity sucked my will to live and Tyler decided it was a good time to really push me to do something that I felt I was not capable of doing!

First he has me do dumbbell floor presses with a leg kick out. This used to be hard for me. Now? I was able to kick out lower to the floor and press the dumbbells straight up and I kinda love this. Anytime I’m pushing weight up like that I feel really good and happy and pleased. This was three sets of 15 with 15lbs dumbbells.

Then? He takes me over to the turf field with 8 lb dumbbells and sliders to put under my feet. First? He wanted me to put my feet on the sliders and then just walk myself down the field without using my legs, they are dead weight.

Oh, I forgot to mention that on Thursday my arms just felt really heavy and horrible. Tyler, fortunately, is used to my weird complaints.

So, he knows my arms feel heavy but he wants me to use solely them and pretend my legs are dead. I complained. I scoffed. But then I tried. I gave it the good, honest, college try. And it was working and I was moving, slowly, down the field. But good lord that hurt my lower back.

So, then he changed it to where he wanted me to walk forward with my arms holding on to the dumbbells then pull my knees up to my chest, then walk forward with my arms and the dumbbells, then pull my knees up to my chest, rinse, repeat until I made it to the traffic cone.

Once I made it to the traffic cone? I had to mountain climbers. Then I had to stand up and do jump squats.

Then? Back down on the ground to walk my way back to the beginning with dumbbells as hands. I’m related to that Scissorhands kid now.

He only made me do that routine twice. But that’s, you know, there and back again. 15 yards each way, maybe?

I whined. I stopped. My knee hurt. My whole body was tense. I made eye contact with other people that were doing things and we all looked miserable together.

Then I had to balance on the bosu ball and hold an 8lb dumbbell behind my head and do 15 crunches. Three sets.

Then hold that dumbell straight up in the air with one hand, cross one leg over the other, then crunch. Repeat on the other side. 3 sets of each, 15 reps.

Then we finished it all up with me having to do the V sit hold. Which I’ve done before and was awesome at. This time? I was all wiggly and then I got giggly and really it was all absurd. He had to keep stopping his watch and saying “What happened that time?!?!” and then he tried to tell me to just not be wiggly. That guy.

Even though I was all muggy and sticky and told him that I had the desire to stab people in the face and that’s why I don’t carry a knife, I did laugh a lot. Over my antics. Over my wiggly. Over the eye contact with other miserable people. It was, actually, a good time.

And that whole dragging myself down the turf field with dumbbells as hands shenanigans? I’m pretty pleased I was able to do that.

Because of the crap and the ugh, I posted pictures on Facebook and literally told people to just tell me how good I look. I didn’t even pretend. Just “Here’s me right now. Tell me I look nice.”

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And people did. Because I know nice people.

Tomorrow I am going on a NINE MILE HIKE! I hope it’s not humid. It’s with a new group. So, I hope they are nice. Otherwise this could be a shitstorm of suck. I have the right attitude, right? Yes.

I am also going to duct tape my heel to ensure it doesn’t blister. Let’s see how that goes!

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