Progress and starting over

Yesterday was gym night and so I went to the gym! I got there early so what did I do? The stair master, yo. For ten minutes. Take that. Tyler came over and was all “Let’s get going!” and I was all “Let me get to ten minutes, that’s less than a minute away!” and he was all “yes!”

Then he says “Tonight I’m going to test you on things we’ve done before. See how you do, how you’ve improved.” And off we went.

I had to do a modified insanity circuit.  I used a 10lb dumbbell for the first set of 6. I do the bicep curl, squat, up, squat and plant the weight, do a squat thrust (or a burpee for all you people that like to call them burpees) then up. Lather, rinse, repeat. He kept reminding me to do all of that in a fluid motion BUT to kind of reset once I was standing back up from the squat thrust so I’m doing a full bicep curl. I did them. They were hard but they were easier than the first time I did these things. And on the second set I did 8 with a 12lb dumbbell and on the third set I did 10 with a 12lb dumbbell.

I had to do dumbbell chest presses with a leg lift. Well…basically I was on the ground with my legs bent at the knees and off the ground. As I press the dumbbell up, I straighten my legs out as low to the ground as I can. Because I’m uncoordinated I sometimes match my arm movement with my legs and he has to keep reminding me to push the dumbbells straight up. Which is funny because he knows why I’m doing it and not that I’m not being strong. I did all three sets of 10 with 15lb weights. And? I smiled on my last set because I realized how much easier this was than the first time I had to do it AND I was doing it with a heavier weight. I high fived myself. I’m not even lying.

Then I did squat 180s which may have been my least favorite thing of them all. Yes. I enjoyed them less than even the burpees. With this exercise I squat all the way down to the ground with a 10lb dumbbell, do a bicep curl, then stand up, and immediately spin. I call the squat portion the gorilla. Because I feel like I look like a gorilla doing it. And on the way up he kept reminding me to be “explosive.” Which means to be fluid and fast! Jump up, Andrea! Kapow! But I’m just happy I wasn’t passing out and it was ugly but dammit they got done. Three sets of 10. The second two sets was with a 12lb weight.

Then I had to do the bicep press and tricep whatever with a dumbbell. We started with the 10lb and moved up to the 12lb for the second two sets. First set was 10, then 13, then 15 reps.

I’d been lightheaded most of the day thanks to some stupid weather system that was in the area. And then as I’m trying to work out without passing out from the dizzy this guy comes and gets on the slammy ropes and starts slamming them in a very fast wavy motion as I’m trying to squat and it’s in my eye line and woah buddy it made me dizzy as all hell and I had to sit down and then explain that I’m just so very odd.

And that was the gym. I felt really good. I see progress. I see me improving. It was awesome. I felt like I’m looking better and getting stronger.

I went to Taco Tuesday with the Wendy family because I like the Wendy family and I like tacos. What’s there to say no to? Nothing, that’s what. And that was great.

Today was a good day. My legs were a bit sore but nothing that gave me pause about Ballerobica.

So, today was my first Ballerobica class. And I felt all sure and strong about it because I’ve been going to the gym now since March and I’ve improved and this is going to be great!

The music starts and she starts telling us what to do as we watch her and ourselves in the mirrors. I’m having to follow dance moves. I’m having to hold my arms up and point my toes. I’m realizing I was too cocky and came in with the wrong attitude and I was kicked down a few notches. Gymming is not the same as Balleting. Nope. People told me. I ignored people.

When I wasn’t all up in my head about stuff, I had a fantastic time. I was moving. I was doing ballet arms and ballet toes and legs and I was moving and sweating and dancing to the music. But then I’d catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I’d get snapped out of the joy and into the reality that my belly is flopping around, my arms are a wee bit floppy, I look all red faced and old, and I’m just awkward and gawky.

But then we got to the barre and we did stuff not in front of a mirror. And then I was free to enjoy it again.

Ballerinas are bossy. They correct your form and they say “Point those toes!” and “Tuck in that butt!” and it’s all very different from the gym and it was all very hard but….so was the gym at first. And I was super excited about this. I love to dance and I need more cardio and there is stretching classes and all sorts of things that will benefit me and I can take the classic straight up ballet class and I think I should do it but I’m going to sleep on it. Because I did cry. Because of fat and old and gawky. And my sister yelled at me. Because of sister.

So, even though I have progress at the gym I will be starting at square one with this. And that is fine. I started at square one at the gym and look at me now. Look how I’ve improved and stuck with it. I’ve cancelled ONE session and that was due to work not me. So, yeah. Ballerinas are hardcore. I did jumping jacks. And ab stuff. And stretches. And toe stuff. And kicks. And arms. And ouch.

The girl that lead the class asked me what I thought so I was honest with her about how close to crying I was and how I felt like it should have been a wee bit easier since I’ve been at the gym and I see progress. Everyone that heard me say that shook their head “nope” and she said that it’s all very different and that for my very first time out I did pretty good and that she only had to correct my form a few times. Which is true. So, that was nice.

But I did it! And then I cried. And now I’m not and tomorrow is Thursday gym day and I’ll talk to Tyler about it and I’ll ponder and we’ll see what I do next. A cliffhanger!


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